guess what ms. universe is talking about

An “incredible experience.” “soooo beautiful!” “I didn’t want to leave, it was such a relaxing place, so calm and beautiful.”

“We hung out with the guys from the East Coast and they showed us the boat inside and out, how they work and what they do, we took a ride around the land and it was a loooot of fun!” (More hints after the break): Continue reading “guess what ms. universe is talking about”

i want to be the renowned hoo-ha doctor

As Tom Bozzo says, The Onion is a priceless national treasure.

Renowned Hoo-Ha Doctor Wins Nobel Prize For Medical Advancements Down There
STOCKHOLM—In recognition of her groundbreaking work treating life- threatening diseases of the privates, renowned hoo-ha specialist Dr. Victoria Lazoff was awarded the Nobel Prize in Lady Medicine this week.

The world’s foremost authority on ailments down south, Lazoff led a team of cutting-edge hoo-ha doctors to develop new strategies for detecting abnormal growth in…you know, that area. The accomplished physician humbly accepted medicine’s highest honor before a crowd of her peers, and spoke about the importance of regular screenings to prevent unnecessary complications up inside one’s business.

Every year, when I teach Sociology of Sexualities, I ask the women students what words they were taught as kids for their vulvas. My faves so far: coochie, kitty, twinkle, and–I kid you not–front bum.