So this morning I’m calling to set up an appointment to get my hair cut.
Shamus: I need a hair cut.
Salon: Great! [Details…] Oh! And we’re having a special right now. With a hair cut you get a free make-up consult.
Shamus: Um… I’m single. [Meaning: there’s no one in my life who could use that]
Salon: PERFECT! This could be that extra thing to give you a boost in your dating life.
Shamus: Um… something tells me… [Interrupted]
Salon: You know, a lot of men are using make up to enhance their natural features. How old are you?
Salon: PERFECT! I mean, you’re much too young for a little nip/tuck! But you’ll find that eye liner and a little foundation can do wonders, and even hold off that knife for a few years.
Shamus: Um… something tells me you’re not the salon for me…
Salon: WHAT? We could be just what you need.
Shamus: If you met me, you’d realize how surreal this conversation is.
I stammered most of my way through the conversation. I relayed the interaction to a friend who commented, ” don’t think surgery on us would ever be considered a “nip and tuck”. I think that’s when they call in the industrial strength wet/dry vac…” Which I found hilarious.
Perhaps with all the competition here in NY the difference between single and not is make-up. But I have a hard enough time just getting showered, dressed, and out the door in the AM. I can’t imagine what would happen if make-up was added to the mix. I also wonder what would happen to my evals.